Miss Piggy & Me

[Verse 1] Stumbled in the bar with a swagger in my step, Saw a pretty face, my mind's a drunken wreck. Called myself Miss Piggy, thought I was slick, But she wasn't havin' it, my act wasn't a hit. [Pre-Chorus] Here I go again, my antics a mess, Hoping for a smile, getting distress. She turns around with a look so deadly, I'm about to learn what it means to tread heavily. [Chorus] Oh no, kicked in the nuts, On the floor, feelin' like a putz. Miss Piggy's gone rogue, my night’s a bust, (oink oink) All because my charms were a little too robust. [Verse 2] Round two, tried again, with a slur in my speech, “Hello, Im Miss Piggy,” (oink oink) but she’s outta reach. My persistence a flaw, I followed her around, Ended up a spectacle, a clown in a meltdown. [Bridge] Hey there Im Miss Piggy,(oink oink) can’t you see? In this dive, we’re all a bit loony. Took one to the jewels, now I'm down, Learned the hard way, what goes around comes around. [Verse 3] Barkeep's laughin', patrons point and stare, I'm the joke of the night, lost in despair. But it’s a lesson learned, in the hardest way, Next drink’s on me, but no more games to play. [Pre-Chorus] There I went again, my antics a mess, Hoped for a smile, got distress. She turned around with a look so deadly, I had just learned what it meant to tread heavily. [Chorus] Oh no, kicked in the nuts, On the floor, feelin' like a putz. Miss Piggy's gone rogue, my night’s a bust, (oink oink) All because my charms were a little too robust. [Bridge] Whiskey courage, beer goggles on tight, In the spotlight, not a hero but a sight. Lesson learned with every wince and tear, Next round's on caution, I'll stick to the beer. [Outro] So next time I'll think before I leap, Keep my intros in check, my dignity to keep. No more Miss Piggy, no more pain, Stick to the drinks, and stay in my lane. (oink oink) [End] [Bridge] Hey there Im Miss Piggy,(oink oink) can’t you see? In this dive, we’re all a bit loony. Took one to the jewels, now I'm down, Learned the hard way, what goes around comes around. [Verse 3] Barkeep's laughin', patrons point and stare, I'm the joke of the night, lost in despair. But it’s a lesson learned, in the hardest way, Next drink’s on me, but no more games to play. [Pre-Chorus] There I went again, my antics a mess, Hoped for a smile, got distress. She turned around with a look so deadly, I had just learned what it meant to tread heavily. [Chorus] Oh no, kicked in the nuts, On the floor, feelin' like a putz. Miss Piggy's gone rogue, my night’s a bust, (oink oink) All because my charms were a little too robust. [Bridge] Whiskey courage, beer goggles on tight, In the spotlight, not a hero but a sight. Lesson learned with every wince and tear, Next round's on caution, I'll stick to the beer. [Outro] So next time I'll think before I leap, Keep my intros in check, my dignity to keep. No more Miss Piggy, no more pain, Stick to the drinks, and stay in my lane. (oink oink) [End] [Bridge] Whiskey courage, beer goggles on tight, In the spotlight, not a hero but a sight. Lesson learned with every wince and tear, Next round's on caution, I'll stick to the beer. [Outro] So next time I'll think before I leap, Keep my intros in check, my dignity to keep. No more Miss Piggy, no more pain, Stick to the drinks, and stay in my lane. (oink oink) [End]